fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I would fuck him just for his dog
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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