i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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