Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize