The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Randomize
