nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
