Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize