Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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