His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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