the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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