I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Text me some of your sweat
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