He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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