like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
