Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
