Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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