I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Did I show you my penis last night?
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
