you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Randomize
