Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize