I wish i was in the wii world.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Randomize
