this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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