Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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