Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
