woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
