You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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