I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
...so i touched it.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
This baby is an asshole
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize