a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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