She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
