Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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