What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
We left an ass print on the piano.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
