i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Randomize
