Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
