these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
