You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
