Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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