Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
