Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
