i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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