did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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