I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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