have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
