do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
