The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize