Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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