i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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