youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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