The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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