in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
