this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
