i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
