I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
