So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
