hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize