Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
