Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Randomize
